My oldest daughter said she wanted pasta for dinner, so I asked her what type she wanted. She went to the pantry and pulled out two boxes. She then took them to my youngest daughter and asked her which ones she wanted. Daughter number 2 pointed to one box, and daughter number 1 said, "no, I want this one," pointing to the other box, "so could you please point to this box?"
How often do we have predetermined outcomes in mind and then pretend to offer people the choice when in fact they really don't have one?
Yes, but...
ReplyDeleteSometimes I ask someone's opinion thinking that I didn't have an opinion and then find I do. Generally it is 'felt' rather than 'thought.' It is when I feel relief at their choice or I feel disappointment that my own leanings are revealed.
This happended for me when my school's math department was adopting a new curriculum. I thought I was completely divided between the two options. In fact, I didn't even want to vote because I felt so split. It looked like the majority was leaning toward a traditional text; at that point I felt my disappointment. It was my emotional response that clarified my thoughts.
This illustrates that sometimes it isn't until someone else makes a declaration that you know how you feel about a situation.